pregnancy thoughts, fears and emotions

I’d be a liar if I didn’t say that the nine months of pregnancy are a challenging time for self-image love. It’s like you have this idea of who you are and what goals you have for your body, and then you get pregnant and you do not know what path you are on anymore.

For me, I have had several thoughts, fears and emotions in regards to my body changing. Some of the those items even make me feel bad about myself and what I say. For example, I have caught myself saying to my husband, “I am so fat right now,” which isn’t true, but yet it’s hard for me to wrap my head around.

So far in my pregnancy I have gained 15-lbs. In the grand scheme of things, 15-lbs is nothing; however, I still have emotions about it. 

I have always been pretty open to telling people that I struggle with my self-esteem sometimes. Over the course of the past 5-6 years, I have definitely found an inner self-confidence, but it still doesn’t make seeing my body change any easier.

I think one of my biggest fears of pregnancy is never getting my body back to where it was. 

I’d be shocked if most women do not feel this way during the course of their pregnancies.

As soon as my body started to grow, I immediately stocked up on all the latest Palmer’s products and started slathering them on my body like I never have before. Sometimes I just think, “Please don’t give me stretch marks!”

Then I have to remind myself, who really cares if I have stretch marks or not? My husband won’t – so why do I? Who am I competing with and why? Why does anyone else, other than myself and those important to me, matter? Why does their input MATTER?

Those questions are tough to face sometimes, but they teach me that I am my own person and that I can compare to no one.

No one has my personality, my hair, my eyes, my nose or my life – so why do I give a damn about anyone who has something I don’t have?

I suppose this is where my emotions come in…

Figuring out how to handle the body changes that come with being pregnant has been both an eye-opening and learning experience.

Eye-opening because who knew your body could do such things, and learning because I keep learning how to become a better person with each passing day.

Things that I have felt during pregnancy:

  1. Scared
  2. Fat
  3. Happy
  4. Loving
  5. Sad
  6. Out of control
  7. Annoyed
  8. Challenged
  9. Growth

You may read that and think I am negative; however, I am here to inform you that I am not. Here is why…

During pregnancy, I think we women are typically made out to be confined to this box. The box is us, secured as a happy person because we are going to bring this miraculous bundle of joy to the world – which is exciting. However, I think, often times, we are shunned from expressing how we feel.

I have had a wide range of emotions these past, nearly, 5-months. Some days I wake up feeling like the best looking woman in the world, and other days I feel like I look like I was hit by a truck. You win some and you lose some. I know this is NORMAL, because my body is building another person and my hormones are all over the place.

I think during pregnancy you should feel how you feel and be able to be honest about it. 

Yes, at the end of this journey you are going to bring the most amazing little miracle to the world, but no one should doubt or question your journey to get there.

Pregnancy is very tough, but you must remember that all of your thoughts, fears and emotions are taking you to a new, stronger stage of life.

If you can bring another human into the world, what can’t you accomplish?

I guess my point for this post today was to just say that pregnancy is not the easiest thing I have ever done, and I am in awe of all the women I know who have had babies.

I think we all have thoughts, fears and emotions about what we are going to look like and how we stack up against others, but in the grand scheme of things that shouldn’t matter.

Today, I am making a promise to kick my self-doubt habit and focus on ME. Why? Because no one has the same life I have and I think I have it pretty dang good – and I bet you do too.

Maddy

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s